edmonton or BUST.....

i have an idea in my head for me and chris to become these 2 amazing money savers for the next year as we journey to living away from both of our families and venture off to edmonton and live with some distant relatives of chris and see where that can put us in a year....im hoping this will put us ahead of all of our bills and move forward with our lives with a clean slate.....as it stands now we are in bills up to our ying yangs and its mostly chris's and its hard to make room for mine.....im not sure what he'd be doing without me and visa versa but i have been putting ALL of my bills on the back burners to pay for his....sometimes i throw it in his face when we fight and i dont want to do that...i want our bills to be just as important as the others and not one being more then the other.......we have a long way to go and hopefully a year in "money land" will put us ahead of the game......i am very stoked to move to a major city with the only person i am going to need to grow old with and hope that everything goes well and not sour.....chris lived away from home b4 with a prior relationship and tat ended badly and i dont want the same for us.......we are great together and though we take each other for grantit sometimes we are there for each other when we need it......i havent felt this close to a boyfriend ever hense the term....x-boyfriend.......i dont want to ever refer to chris as an x and am goin to do all i can to make him happy.......
so we're heading er to edmonton to make some money and we are doing it without his car so we're gonna have to make friends very quickly and get drives to and from werk.....i dont think ill find it very hard but chris on the other hand is very shy and underspoken....so i might have to halp him out there...and not to mention i am the JEALOUS girlfriend and i hope he doesnt end up with a girl as a good friend where we end up.......but he does get along better with guys so im crossing my fingers for that bridge when it comes up......i cant imagine chris being so dumb as to befriend a girl but we'll ahve to se i guess....i on the other hand get along better with guys so i guess ill have to comprimise....i have alot of trust in chris but not fully.....(past relationships die hard)....and i try to keep that trust issue at a minimal but sometimes it creates a problem but we usually talk through it and overcome the obsticle......
edmonton is going to be a big jump for both of us...neither one of us even visited or vacationned there ever.....so its going to be an eye opener at the least.....if my friend Deanna can pick up and go to Korea for a whole year with a week visit home in over a year i can do it too......we were goin to go to ontario but chris first move with a girl was there and i dont want to relive any past issues he had in our relatioship.....we do have an open mind when it comes to what we want to do with the rest of our lives and what the other will need to do to help the other out......we cant decide on a place to settle the rest of our lives in together but at least we know its goin to be with each other.......we have a very loving relationshiop with alot of "i love yous" and "baby" and "xxxxxooooo" but love isnt all a relationship needs and im the first to tell anyone that....you can love someone with all your heart but if the other doesnt feel the same then your "stuck between a rock and a hard place"........love is a four letter word that means nothing if the intentions of both arent closely the same.......if you both love each other and one decided to become an orgy instructor from some spiritual eye opener....and demonstrate tactics on their students.....can love really hold that relationship together .....NOPE.....
i hope everything works out for me and chris and we overcome our bill situation and grow closer and closer to each other as the days away from our families......i hope it pulls us together and not apart......i want to grow old with this guy......i hope i someday make him feel exactly the way i do.....maybe he does already and im not reading in between the lines?..........
i love you baby and i hope to make you happy day by day......