so i finally bit the bullit, left the vaseline home and stopped stream from fuckin me in the ass anymore...I QUIT!!!!!!

so i had to go to work last night cause "stream" was in a pinch and needed ppl to take calls and i had to go in for a 7 hour shift with only 1-15 minute break...how fair is that when supervisors can smoke and play as much as they want (in their own poop...refer to chris and his revised 3 little pigs blog...lol...)whenever they want....as well as some of the team members (well the ones giving the supervisors head on the side that is).....so i settle down in my seat not knowing what to expect and i hear *ding* in my ear and without any short training, keep in mind i havent taken a call since may 28th...they dont care if i remember anything or want to tell me if anything is different, just take a headset and have-at-er....and who said stream wasnt the "best place in the world to work for".........a few calls later chris shows up and says hows the phones he's on his super (in training) so since i only got a 15 min break i call down to intraday and ask if i could take a 1/2 hour super and they firmly say NO...we werent even busy they were just dirty like that....so i put my phone in release sign off for the night...go to my supervisor....and sign a resignation sheet.....a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders...what a releif to be away from the most stressful thing i have ever had to face in my life...and talk about favoritism and unfairness..it tops those attributes in a flash......not to mention my beivment days were dished out so that one of them landed on my short shift day...sunday(4 hours)...dont worry i have it all planned out in my mind what to say to unemployment and the labor board....im not staying quiet for this one.....i wouldnt wish that place on my worst enemy....well maybe....lol....

ppl reading my blog...=...the good...the bad...and the ugly.....

so my day starts off pretty normal except for the slight headache i have from drinkin he night b4 and i start to do the usual things eating and bringing my neice and nefew their grading day presents(amber karaokee machine and tyler nintendo 64 controller and game and a plant) and my day goes on and as the night gets closer we start to head off to the grad party and i forget my smokes at home so we swing back and we see a car driving the opposite way from us and hands waving us back and we go back to our driveway and its my friends james gray, sean luker, shawn(groom to be)simms and some guy with a digital camera...and they proceed to tell me its for a scavanger hunt and they need 3 pictures from me...bra shot, nude tit shot, and a camel toe shot.....omg...noone besides the camera guy can make the camera work so he has to take the first pic of me then chris gets the hang of it and he takes the other two...i didnt want everyone in the room with me so they waited patiently in the living room.....dont know why it mattered to me cause im sure once they got in the car they were lookin at them sayin...."god bless georgina"....lol....so i was out last night to a grad party where there was free liquor floating all over the place and there was some good company so we drank lots and had a great time all around.....then off to the main event with chris...omg he went....lol....and we only stay long enuff to see shawn in his very drunk state and i had a few danses with him and congradulated him on his wedding with megan to take place soon.....then...i see my supervisor and as usual he says "georgina reid" then says who died....refering to my breivement for work.....and at first i think its crewl but hey someone has to know if i need to get paid for the 2 days that stream gives ya to greive.....to me you should get off what ya need, to some extent, cause what if it were my daughter or son or mom or dad.....just because i never "seen my granmother in 4 yrs"...(<--- this so politely got mentionned to bernie without obviousily any of the rest of the post mentionned to him...not naming any names but you know who you are and that wasnt cool at all to tell bernie i havent seen nan for 4 yrs as if its insignifigant that she died to me....how do you sleep at night?) dont mean it was any easier...my mother was beside herself couldnt function even to write a phone number down...kept askin "what am i looking for again(pen)"....so either way someone has to be there for her to make sure she's ok...shes my mom i dont talk to her that often not as long as 4 yrs now...but nonetheles..id be beside myself and im damn sure 2 days would not be long enuff for anyone in that situation...so in retrospect alot of things happened to night...the good...the bad...and the ugly.....just a regular day in the life of........ME...

just another day in life's vicious circle.....

so my day starts off with me rolling over and givin the man a smoochie and getting on the ball to go to my nan's wake and chris as usual stays in bed as i rummage around to get stuff ready and such.....so i decide to call my mom to see if shes ok and to my surprize she's in bed and not going....well i wouldnt have it...so we get our showers and go to pick her up...we get to the first wake and we're late so my mother decides she doesnt wanna go in so we take her back to my place to talk and chill for a bit to get her mind off the goins on....meanwhile im in agony not knowing exactly what to say to make the situation any better so she keeps herself occupied with solitare on the commputer and mending the hem in her pants but the time is drawing nearer and nearer to when she has to face the funeral home...I, on the other hand, want nothing to do with going in and seeing "my grandmother" btw it looks nothing like her i took a short visit in to see her while my mom waited in he car and i never even recognized her....so we drop my mom off and she stars her jorney without me and my sister takes over the grieving process wih my mother....its so hard to grasp the thought that someday i am going to have to go through the same thing my mom is but only with different names on the obituaries...i do not want to go b4 my mom just for the simple fact that it would crush my mom's very being to go b4 her children but on the otherhand i dont want to look at my mom and think the same thing i thought when i seen my grandmother there lying lifelessly...that doesnt look like my mom there cold and bloodless....god pray i dont have too much to regret when my mom passes...i vow to spend more time with my father and mother knowing well that every second wasted is time i will regret....make what you will of this but remember regret is a harsh reality...do something b4 its too late.....

when grandmothers cannot talk to tell you how much they love you or you are not sure they can hear your words to them......

..........my nan died last night.....
i got a call yesterday telling me these horrible words "nan has 1 hour to live"...of course doctors have been known to be wrong in the past but this one felt like it was real.....so then i call Chris and he already knows the news cause my sister had called the cell phone to tell me and i wasnt with him so he quickly got a shower and picked me up within 10 mins to take me in and console me......i wasnt close to my grandmother the last time i seen her was like 4 yrs ago bringing her favorite thing, diet coke and to say hi....looking back now i wish i had stayed longer to talk about some more things but you cannot regret the past only look towards things you can change now....so i reach the home and get on the elevator not knowing what to expect only my sister telling me "she looks nothing like nan"....and there is my mom and 2 aunts 1 cousin my sister and my aunt in law(missing 2 daughters whom passed before her, 2 daughters living away, a son and countless grandchildren and greatgrandchildren)....needless to say it felt cold and sad in that room knowing everyone in the room knew what was to come very soon...so my mother softly says come over here and tell her you love her and i slowly reach the bedside...and shokingly to me i dont recognize her there gasping for air mouth wide open eyes just gazing at the ceiling not focusing on anything or even blinking...at this point there was no swallow refexes...i never seen anything like this before only on tv i have been to many wakes and funerals with loved ones but none that i seen taking their last few breaths...i felt sad and i start to uncontrolably cry because it is very overwhelming to me to be there at this time in my nan's life stages...with life you are only guaranteed one thing...to die at some point...some sooner then others but inevitably this is fate...i feel like i havent done anything in my lifetime to die say for instance tomorrow so i have promised myself to see through what i have dreamt of for a long time...to go to school to be an auto mechanic to have at least 2 children by the age of 35 and to live very comfortably with a loving father and husband...these are not outrageous dreams ones that i can accomplish and for my nan i am going to do so...i feel like i have alot to live for and am going to live on vicariousily taking what my nan may or may not have done and make my dreams come true...you will be sadly missed but not forgotten nan...please watch out for me and do not be too dissapointed if i get out of line or do something stupid....I LOVE YOU...and am deeply sorry for not letting you know that everyday since the day i could talk...