this post is specifically for stephen fraser and the comment he made on my last post....

ok i have no idea if you have a woman or not and as for the "truth or rumor" thing and you saying that one of them was about you and that i am spreading bullshit...dont do stuff you dont want people to find out about...and as for us being friends i destinctly remember trying to steer you away from one of my own friends because its not always about how many notches you have around your belt its how you treat people and what people think about you for what you say about others and what you do for them....i remember telling you not to be pissing away a good thing you could have had with one of my friends....she didnt deserve to be lied to and she deserved more then what you were looking for....she is a great person and you did have a g/f at that time that you were "not getting along with" so i told you i was gonna tell my friend and you decided to mention it casually after i told her....this post is not even really about that I AM NOT MAD AT YOU FOR TRYING TO MAKE YRSELF OUT TO BE THE GOOD ONE AND ME THE BAD ONE....i never mentionned any names...if someone knows about the rumor and knows the names it aint from me i never mentionned names remember (read below) and as long as i can type and can get to the internet i am going to talk about what people say behind other peoples backs....i heard this stuff from random people at bars on messenger wherever that are close to if not really good friends with the people "implied" but the difference is i am here trying to get the truth about them....and i dont mention the names the people that are close to you and others do.....so i dont think you should come on here and bash me you should be bashing the people starting the rumors and come clean or defend yourself for whats being spread about you from your friends.....p.s. this post is for your comment for my b/f about what i really do when i am drunk....well you know chris and you hit on me knowing i was going out with him.....and chris knows everything about me and more then you ever will and as for what i am really like when i am drunk....i dont get drunk without him cause anyone that knows us knows we do everything together if i go out he comes and if he doesnt i dont go and visa versa......i have to let you in on a little secret if yr gonna fling shit you have to have proof to back it up....noone that knows mine and chris's relationship at all will believe anything you say cause anything that you do say is going to be a blattened lie....my comments and such have NO NAMES....if i have mentionned any names its because it happened to me or i seen it with my own eyes.....i have never hit on you or any of your friends nor anyone for that matter while dating chris.....so what am i really like when i am drunk...clingy as shit to chris...mad at him for lookin at another girl cause im drunk and the jealousy thing is way out of wack or hmmmmmm never around you so what is it that you seen me do with your own eyes while i was drunk?...a manogomous relationship...sound it out if i spelled it wrong.....do you know what that means?.....cause i do.....you dont kiss touch or ask someone out while you are seeing one person ONLY....an open relationship is one where you can screw as many people as you want as long as all parties know that that is how it is.....there is as much difference in those two relatioships as there is in black and white...so in ending id like to say i have a manogomous relationship with chris and would do anything for him and most of my friends....people who get to know me know i might take a long while to answer back to calls they have made to me or dont call back exactly when i say i am going to but they know if it came down to something important and needing me for something "life or death" i am the first one to visit them in the hospital or whatever the case may be they can count on me....people have more respect for someone like that then someone who takes pride in being the person that someone cheated on their b/f g/f with or just plain lies all the time....i dont know you fraser.....so the last few statements may not be directed to you personally but if it hit a nerve then i think you may have to do some deep thinking about yourself before you start to talk about me or anyone else for that matter ....keep in mind what i wrote there fraser....the last few statements may not be directed to you personally.....the truth hurts so if you dont want to know whats being said about you then dont read this blog...cause you would be surprised who is behind yr back trashing you.....

here's a list of things i have heard lately ..no names will be mentionned.....you choose...FACT OR RUMOR.....

(1)...girl with boyfriend....out with some friends at hermans and is caught locking lips on the danse floor with someone who, by word of mouth, is known for his smooth talking (has a woman appearently but plays the we are not happy card)....FACT-SOME TRUTH-RUMOR?....

(2)...supervisor and coworker (on the phone).....supervisor has a crush on the girl on the phones....he has found out about the lip-locking and is pissed at her and others for letting it happen to him?....FACT-SOME TRUTH-RUMOR?....

(3)...same people as in numer 2.....an email was sent out to the girl from supervisor and then forwarded to all involved and some people were trashed in it?...FACT-SOME TRUTH-RUMOR?....

(4)...supervisors (noone in particular)....screw people on their team and keep them off the phones even though they dont know their ass from their holes? ...FACT-SOME TRUTH-RUMOR?....

now you can comment or email me with some more...FACT-SOME TRUTH-RUMOR?....and i will be more then happy to post them.....

went to the gilly last night and like any other time i am around "streamers" im asked about my blog...

someone caught my attention last night about my blog...they said..."what happened to your blog it used to be so juicy...what happened?"........well to sum it up i think people dont know how to handle any type of "gossip"...good or bad .... theres no such thing as bad publicity........its easy to say something....backing it up is a different story ....well i've been asked alot lately if it was me who had said things about ashley....nope....like im sure i have said before .... i dont say things unless i see them or hear from a close friend....(not a flash in the pan friend either).....but even then i have to investigate a little more before i'll write about it.....i need facts before i start flinging shit around right?........i know all too well what its like to try to get yourself out of a situation that someone else created by way of rumor.....its not easy trying to fix something that everyone is buzzing about is it?......so in turn i treat everything like as if it were me....but again....if you do something and later you feel embarassed about it...you shouldnt have done it in the first place...ill be the first one to admit that i did something that i am ashamed of or that i shouldnt have done in the first place...but its harder redeem yourself when you have people goin on before they know anything factualy..........so in all instances in my experience....if you hear a rumor about someone and then you hear kinda the same rumor from someone else but the place changed or the person or the kiss or sex card is changed.....then its probably a lie.....if you hear it from someone close to the person like within one friend away and they are not fueding then its probably true wether or not the sourse of the rumor is willing to admit it or not......but liek anything people are adapting, with age, what rumors really are....RUMORS.....like my dad always said....if ya cant stand the heat stay outta the kitchen.....in life that means if ya dont want people to know your business then dont tell people or dont do it in the first place.....

happy 23rd b-day joey...........

joey aka bonaducci is celebrating his 23rd b-day today and me and chris decidedto get him floor tiles for his bathroom....hope i got enough...he's goin through a hard time in his life right now and he is looking towards god for peace of mind and answers to why he is going through so much in such a short period of time...i have to give the guy props i mean if i had to go through what he is facing right nowi dont think i would be able to take it in such stride like he does......when i am faced with stress it can take me down one of 3 roads....fuck it all road.....scream and hollar road...or cry like a baby road....hes not gone down any of these...hes gone down...god what the fuck is your masterplan road.....and hey if thats yr thing then by all means let it save yr soul....but me i take things from my friends and family as my means to the ends reality check for what goes on with me....but i think everyone has their faults and if he says something out of context to someone or anyone in particular you have to shun it off cause you have to put yourself in their shoes before you can pass judgement on anyone not to mention noone's closet if totally free of skeletons....so before you feel or say or think anything about someone ask yourself one question....do i know anything deep or important about the person i am passing judgement on?......

the reasons for the things going on in my life right now im sure will all come together and make sence soon enough........

i've noticed myself being more involved in my relationship than with any of my friends lately....i dont know how long it's been since i talked o my friends mike, jamie, sean, or anyone for that matter...i find myself being around chris's friends way more than any of my own...not that i dont like his friends jamie, joey, and james.....i like them all alot they are funny and great people...a little weird at times but what can ya expect from ppl that are from tower road, birch grove and morien..lol...j/k...but seriouisly my friends must be pissed...but i dont find myself wanting to go to bars or parties or get high....i am starting to like the parking in the back of town and doin the coffee thing but my friends arent into that so its hard to get together right....or so i thought that was the reason anyways.....but the more i think about it..i realise its not that fully...its because ive become so lazy that i dont want to call people or get ready for anything....im i a rut right now fighting about saving money and the essential things that come in a relationship....i love the one im in but like any its a long process to get things right....knowing that i am going to move 24 hours away from home and now talking about moving to alberta....its hard to try and make things perfect in 3 months or however long its gonna take for us to move......but hey like anything else its gonna be a long journey to make things be a life long relationship....i just wish i could predict the future to know if im doing the right things for myself and my friends and everything around me....but i guess everything happens for a reason and the reasons for the things going on in my life right now im sure will all come together and make sence soon enough........

have i been sleeping my life away?....

the other day me and chris found ourselves so tired that we ended up (get this) waking up to a wal-mart employee rounding up carts in the parking lot....now if thats not a funny enuff blog to stop right there.....i dont know what is...lololololol....nite ya'll its a little past my bedtime....yeah right im on my way outta chris's to go watch a movie at my sister's...its only 2:10 am no need to sleep this early....have a good one....JOKE OF THE DAY......ONE DAY A GUY WALKS INTO A PSYCHIATRISTS OFFICE , WRAPPED COMPLETELY IN SURAN WRAP , AND BEFORE THE GUY EVEN SPEAKS , THE DOCTOR SAYS " I KNOW WHAT YR PROBLEM IS....I CAN SEE YOU'RE NUTS CLEARLY FROM HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!"..........THANKS SEAN....YOU DA BOMB....

now onto bigger and better thing

so me and chris were gonna get an apt and with our bills (well his bills cause i have none) we would have never saved to go to ontario...well maybe after about a year.....and thats being generous.....anyways we're gonna clean out the little bit of junk in my sister's basement and put a little "love nest" down there.....and get some internet so we can talk when he's not there....lol... but we're always together like being attatched at the hip....well i guess its better then hating each other and never talkin or wantin to do stuff together like those couples that have sex like on occassions (x-mas and such...lol) cause thats just wrong...**shudders**...we have our share of fights but its usually when hes not stayin at my sisters or i havent seen him in a while and we miss each other...i absolutly hate it when we dont get to sleep in the same bed together...(it kills me to even think that we arent sleeping together tonight) ... but we will have an apartment in ontario by the end of nov or dec depending on if we were gonna come home for x-mas or not cause that would just be a waste of money right.....well anyways i am just ramblingon about chris and i so im outtie for this blog......

schooling for me......

so today i decided that i am going to move out of my sisters (like tomorrow morning) cause she is driving me nuts cause well she is a nut.....and take a 4 month course at marconi hopefully with jamie (chris's friend) called heavy duty mechanics........ and i think i am going to get a job i will enjoy..i like working with my hands ( no pun intended) and i am definitely gonna like the idea of a set schedule and a full time job with benefits and a "career" in something that i can excell at...how butchy is that but at least im starting to learn that if this is what is gonna make me happy then i should go for it for sure.... and this is a great opportunity for me and to start a new life with the man without having to work a dead end job i will have a career and schooling behind me just like chris....thanks hunnie for supporting me and talking me into the opportunity of a lifetime...as ive said many a times you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and am very greatful to have you in my life ;@)
.......love you baby xoxoxooxo